Deteriorate

              The sky is crying as she begins to fade. I watch her eyes melting away, the only color left shines dull and grey. Silence is the disease between us, even as her fingers curl into the fabric of my shirt. She lay sweating and shuttering, incapable of functioning like a proper being any longer. I can’t bear to see her struggling so fervently; instead, turning away to watch the rain falling in the world locked outside iron vented windows.

                It had never been meant to hurt like this. I should not feel so cold with her life fading in my arms. This is the moment I have been waiting for, is it not? I brought her to life so that I could hear her scream, yet she doesn’t utter a sound as soft, laboured breaths gently brush the side of my face.

                There was a gasping sore ripping its way through my chest, but she is too far gone to notice the way she usually could. I feel the sticky fingers of fear and grief while I focus desperately on breathing clearly.

                I have grown too attached and now I pay the price. She was only meant to be one more source of payment just like all the others before her. Perhaps this is a lesson to remind me it is a sin to love her kind. The anguish coursing through my veins builds up into a stronger pain worse than any man’s blade could possibly inflict. How had it come to this?

                Her fingers fell away from my shirt, drawing my attention back to her. I place a shaking palm upon her cheek, pulling her gaze to meet the ice in my eyes, My chest aches to kiss her, but I hold still and wait. The end is coming quickly and soon she will be lost forever. There is no need for senseless romanticism now.

                I watch her lips curl up onto the barest smile before finally, her eyes roll back, and she is free of my toxic arms. Only then, with her body heavy and limp, do I bow my head to allow red hot tears to blind me.

Advertisements